Lady J on Love: Roller Coasters

As a tween, I've always loved taking roller-coaster rides. Probably because mom always imagined it to be the dangerous ride at the amusement park. But there's something exhilarating about these rides, screaming at the top of my lungs and feeling the winds rush through my hair. I loved the adrenaline rush and that's how I wanted my life to be: a roller-coaster ride, an adventure that surprises you at every corner.

Guess what? I sort of got my wish, for my life after my mid-twenties was exactly a roller-coaster ride. Never a dull moment since meeting my husband, J.

Three years into our courtship, J decided to pack his bags and leave for Tokyo where a new job offer awaited. Things were fine and dandy but I wasn't sure if I could survive the long-distance relationship. I wasn't going to sit around the house, mope around or better yet go all crazy wondering what he was doing in the Land of the Rising Sun. When he popped the question before his departure, I took the plunge and said YES. Mom thought I was crazy to accept the proposal. I guess she was just looking out for me, for fear that he would have a change of heart.

At Farm Tomita in Furano

Thankfully, he didn't. Instead, as cliché as it may sound, absence did indeed make the heart grow fonder. Dates were in the form of online video calls and daily email updates. I also relished our bi-annual holidays to Tokyo that were often peppered with side-travels around Japan with J.

With my classmates from the Japanese language school at the local Hanami (Fireworks) boat party

After a year or so, we finally tied the knot at the end of 2006 and the life as I knew it was packed into 20-odd boxes to be shipped to our new home in Tokyo. My life as an expat wife began. I never really had to cook or do household chores when I was living in Singapore, so I struggled with the laundry and started from scratch honing my paltry cooking skills.

Snowboarding in Niseko, Hokkaido during winter

Ten months later, J's company decided to relocate him back to Singapore and so, 100 boxes and furniture in one huge container accompanied us home. Did I enjoy my short stint as an expat wife in Japan? For sure! In between domestic chores, I roamed the streets freely, sat around in cafes on the busy streets of Ginza, Shibuya and Shinjuku and marveled at the fashion-forward Tokyoites. During winter, I practiced hard at our new-found hobby - snowboarding.

Fast-forward to 2011. A new job offer in Singapore with the opportunity of a temporary relocation to Geneva came knocking. We discussed at length whether he should take up the offer as life back home was on track. Did I want to stay in Singapore and do the long-distance thing? No, for the 14-hr traveling would just kill me.

Do we really want to rock the boat? Not really, as we had just moved into our new place, established a close circle of friends, and were spending most of our time with family and our superbly adorable fur-kid, Sparky, whom we love to bits.

But I knew it was one of J's dreams to work in Europe, and the relocation was going to be for about a year. As the supporting wife, I encouraged him to pursue this dream with me by his side. But what does this second relocation mean for us, or more specifically, me?

Another turn in the thrilling roller-coaster ride, I guess. It would be a good chance for me to take a break and reinvigorate our marriage with more time. I traded my corporate wardrobe filled with frilly dresses and high heels, and reprised my role as a "domestic princess." Well, if I am going to be stuck at home doing household chores and cooking, I might as well give myself a fancy title.

I embraced my new challenge and thought to myself that surely this time round it will be a piece of cake, having done the "expat wife" stint in Tokyo. But it ain't true. I forgot a little thing called "cultural difference" between Asia and Europe. Oh, and let's not forget about the standard of living in Geneva compared to that in Singapore or even Tokyo.

Jet d'Eau - one of Geneva's famous landmarks

According to the Global Cost of Living survey 2010/ 2011 conducted by Mercer, Geneva ranks fifth as the world's most expensive city for expatriates. Tokyo, on the other hand, is now ranked second. However, having lived in Tokyo previously, I felt that the standard of living in Geneva is somewhat compromised.

Yes, things aren't cheap in Tokyo. A decent meal at a random noodle shop would cost me at most 1000 yen (USD 12). But here in Geneva, a simple salad with a drink at a take-out can cost me CHF 19 (USD 22). A bus-ride to town would cost me about CHF 3 (USD 3.5).

I felt miserable at the loss of my financial freedom and having to tighten the purse-strings. The loneliness started to set in and roaming the shopping streets along Rive lost its appeal after a while. I busied myself with chores and spent most of my waking hours in front of my MacBook, but I craved for friendship.

I whined about how miserable my expat life has been. Friends hearing of my sorry plight cheered me up, cyber-friends and twit-peeps sent me virtual hugs, shared their experiences and encouraged me to go out there and find new hobbies.

So, I did. I changed gears and instead of wanting a fast ride, I decided to go on a cruising mode. I picked myself up, made a couple of new friends and kept myself busy with new cyber-projects.

Is this roller-coaster ride going to be smooth-sailing from now on? I hardly think so, as we're still trying to adjust to the ways of living here in Geneva. Singaporeans who have been living here for a while tell me in time to come, we will fall in love with this city. I'm still waiting for that day to come, but I guess as with all great love stories, mine can and will be nurtured.

Our love affair in this new city awaits

[Photo of roller-coaster sourced from the Internet]